Level 15 - The Spider's Website

Last Week's Quests - Failed!
 
I seem to have contacted the majority of my old friends, but they, like me, seem to be all too focused on life and everything else. A few are having kids, others are basically nesting with their significant others. I don't know much about that aside from that I used to have one and now I don't. The way I see it, either I will need to get really comfortable being a third wheel or find someone to date. It can't be that hard to meet someone, right? I mean, I've played The Sims. It's stupid easy in there. Walk up to someone, talk to them, do that a bunch, flirt, kiss, date.

It's been nearly a month since I have seen a gaggle of single girls at a bar so I decided to make a dating profile on a website. I should have been focusing on my quests, but I seem to have become sidetracked with creating this profile. It's incredibly stupid, I know, but it shouldn't be too hard to at least talk to people or get a date.

Since nothing came of these quests last week, I should attempt them again.

This Week's Quests: 

• Attempt to find my old friends
• Attempt to meet a girl
• Find a new hobby 
• Find people to talk to on the website

To Be Continued...
Dave

Level 14 - Lone Warrior

Last Week's Quests - Success!
 
I found some decent local bands. There is this place in town where the majority of bars are. Almost every bar had a band. I kept alternating between bars, but I couldn't find a bar where I felt at ease. There was this weird delta blues rock band at the Smoker's Hut, a rock band at the Pub, and a slew of bands with an uncertain genre at the other bars. The bands were fine, but there is this weird sensation of going to a bar alone. That sensation is usually amplified when looking around and seeing a ton of people in groups.

I'm wondering lately where a lot of my friends are at. Stan always seems to be working at the hotel and Paul seems busy a lot lately, but where have my other friends gone? I know I have more than this.


I did get to go to the book store though. Talk about a needle in a haystack. It's a pain trying to save money and get a book to read. I suppose I can go back to the library, but I may need to give the librarian a little time to cool down.

This Week's Quests: 

• Attempt to find my old friends
• Attempt to meet a girl
• Find a new hobby

To Be Continued...
Dave

Level 13 - Tavern Town

Last Week's Quests - Success!
 
Within a week of beginning to play Minecraft, I have decided to quit playing Minecraft.So I haven't really played games online with random people. It was going well. I was building fun stuff and allowing myself to have fun. Then, the other day, I was building a free floating house out of glass when this jerk messed it up. Someone saw and helped me. Soon after, I helped that nice guy build his own house. Within a half hour I grew an alliance with the majority of the people on the map. Then, the first guy to join the alliance asked if I was his friend. I was a little confused by the straightforwardness of the question. The person then told me they were 10 years old. Everyone in the alliance proceeded to tell their ages and it was evident that I was the eldest by at least six years.

Status Effect - [Awkward]

I tried hanging with a few friends. There was a party and I was supposed to meet a girl there. I have learned something about descriptions. They said I would "either love her or hate her." Someone said that about the movie Avatar and I can tell you that I freaking hated that movie. That girl was worse than Avatar. She was just dull and boring. Anyway, I went hanging around town and went to a bar where this band was playing. I think I have found my new hobby: checking out local bands at bars.

I tried looking for my jobs, but I couldn't find any. I'm thinking the hotel job may have to hold me for a while. This week at work, I talked down to by this crazy blonde lady. I didn't put something 1-inch too far to the left. Why is it that party planners lose all ability to be personable around people?

This Week's Quests: 

• Attempt to find more local bands
• Browse around a book store

To Be Continued...
Dave

Level 12 - The Great Conversationalist

Last Week's Quests - Success!
 
Finally, I got the quiet girl from work to finally talk. She only talked shit, but she spoke nonetheless.

Achievement Unlocked! - The Great Conversationalist (10 GP)


I like to think that my charisma level is rather high and, as such, like to help people out of their shells. Hell, if someone is entertaining enough or does a great job at something, I will shake their hand. The Quiet One did something rather great today and offered to shake her hand. She wasn't for it so I offered to high five instead. After denying the high five she claimed that she doesn't like touching hands. I respect people and their crazy little things so I let it go; however, I couldn't let it go about five minutes later when she high fived a bunch of people. I'm thinking this Quiet One doesn't enjoy me as a person. Looks like I may have an enemy of sorts.

Returning home, I attempted my new hobby of Minecraft. It's pretty fun. I mean, I don't have the actual game, but it allows me to interact with people and build random crap. Sometimes that's the sort of thing you need, you know? The game seems pretty straight forward and it is pretty cool. It gave me an idea for a little adventure story to write too.

I got to hang out with a few friends this week too. We played a few video games and went to a local bar called Jokerz. It was honestly one of the few good times I have had in a bar. There were laughs, cute bartenders, and I danced with some crazy chicks on the floor. It was a pleasant experience overall. I don't know why I don't do this sort of thing more often. Being around positive people really works wonders.

This Week's Quests: 

• Attempt Minecraft some more
• Hang with some friends
• Look for more jobs

To Be Continued...
Dave

Level 11 - Ghost-Busty's

Last Week's Quests - Success!
 
Finally, the quest for Madam Nasty's Gentleman's Club has been achieved!

Achievement Unlocked! - Irony in Advertising (2 GP)


It was an eye opening experience and very telling of myself. Paul and I walked and immediately there were girls in their underwear. My knee jerk reaction was to look away and apologize. It was only later that I relaxed enough to realize this is their "uniform." The hard part about being there was that I kept thinking in terms of girls that are and aren't my type....that and I forgot everything I learned about proper etiquette in a strip club. I tried getting Paul to get a lap dance from one of the girls, but he was too shy. Instead, I decided to give it a try.

It was entertaining and maddening at the same time.



A lot of the time I was distracted by this super pale woman there. She seemed really nice, but I never had a chance to talk to her. I suppose I will have to attempt going another time. Not too soon though. That place is expensive.





I got to go to the library as well and the girl there seemed pretty busy as well. Apparently, it was children's week and these schools would come in to visit and have story time. In terms of a hobby, I have taken up the game Minecraft...the free version. It is a pretty interesting game...when I'm not having my buildings destroyed by schmucks. I will attempt this some more, but we will see if it stays my hobby.

This Week's Quests: 

• Attempt Minecraft some more
• Hang with some friends
• Attempt to write

To Be Continued...
Dave

Level 10 - Of Owls and Women

Last Week's Quests - Failed!
 
Turns out that the strip club was a bit of a bust. No, it still exists, but the story is a little more interesting than that. As it turns out, Paul has been raised to basically be a Paladin. His parents sent him to parochial schools since he was five years old and he just graduated from a private college that highly focuses on religion. He didn't end up wanting to go to the strip club, which was cool because it made me realize I didn't know what to expect from the club either.








Instead, I low-balled him into going to Hooters, which was great because he thought it was another type of strip club. I took him and entire families were there. Though it made me realize that I had never been there while single and began thinking about my ex. I should probably email her again and apologize. When I was there I thought of a good ad campaign for the restaurant: Come for the tits. Stay for tits despite the food being horrible.

Good news though. I did get to know the bellhop girl a little more. As it turns out, she is fantastically nuts...at least that's what the cute bartender told me. There is this mini-bartender girl that looks like Tina Fey and she is really funny. As it turns out, she is friends with a few strippers and gave me something very important...



Item Acquired - Knowledge on Proper Strip Club Etiquette

Reina still doesn't talk. She is kind of is like a robot: all business and no play. Part of me wants to nickname her R2-D2, but I feel that is giving her too much credit in cool points. Instead, I shall name her R-3PO.

This Week's Quests: 

• Attempt to go to strip club once more.
• Go to the library
• Find something to occupy time...a hobby?

To Be Continued...
Dave

Level 9 - Leisure Suit Dave

Last Week's Quests - Failed!
 
I planned to get a lot done this week, but I realized too late that I had made plans already to go to a friend's wedding. The wedding was pretty amazing in a fantastically nerdy way. My friend walked up the aisle to a song John Williams wrote for Star Wars. Weddings are great for the sole premise hanging out with women in dresses and attempting to get their phone number...and this wedding was no different. My friend was fantastically cool enough to invite several of her single cousins and tried to introduce me to them.
 

Cousin #1 - While too tall for me, she was pretty amazing. We danced, but then she found a guy more her height to dance with.

Cousin #2 - This one was a bit too short on attention span for me and so I ignored her completely.

Cousin #3 - Wasn't so bad, but she was married so it was a no-go.


The cousins ended up being somewhat disappointing, but the party was fantastic overall. I even hit on one of the bartenders. She was pretty amazing, but anyone that serves me kitty cocktails for free all night is sure enough to win me over. Especially when they are wearing a mini-skirt. Unfortunately I didn't get her number, but who cares? I had fun and that is all that matters. As for next week, it looks like I will be continuing my quests from last week.

This Week's Quests: 

• Go to strip club with Paul
• Get to know the bellhop girl
• Try to make Reina talk
• Write for fun

To Be Continued...
Dave

Level 8 - In a 2-Bit Hotel

Last Week's Quests - Failed!
 
I'm really trying to get use to this hotel job, but it's growing rather strange. My coworkers are stranger than anything. There is that one guy that trained me, Jim, and he continues to mutter how I should change my method in approaching tasks before reiterating that he still isn't my boss.  He isn't so bad, but I don't understand him. I also work this weird goth chick named Reina that kind of just stares at me. It's very strange. She doesn't talk, just stares. In terms of last week's quests, I have began infuriating my boss somewhat. I screwed up on a few things because my training wasn't that great. When he approached me saying, "WHY DON'T YOU KNOW HOW TO DO THIS?!" I would respond with, "I know, this is crazy, right?"

On a lighter note, I became friends with someone that works at the front desk (that isn't Stan).

Item Acquired - Free Admission tickets to Strip Club

Not only did I make this new friend at the front desk, but I figured out a way to cheer up my friend Paul. Also, I have made friends with a guy in the laundry department and a girl that works as bellhop so that will be fun, exploring new friendships.

This Week's Quests: 

• Go to strip club with Paul
• Get to know the bellhop girl
• Try to make Reina talk
• Write for fun

To Be Continued...
Dave

Level 7 - Level Boss

Last Week's Quests - Failed!

I had my first day of work at my new job. My friend, Stan, got me work at this hotel he works at. I had my interview and my first day the following afternoon. My new boss basically threatened me in the interview that if I do poorly, they will fire my friend for putting in a good word for me. Apparently weddings are big at this hotel and so there is a wedding every Saturday. From that point I have decided that I will make working with me extremely difficult for him. My boss, not my friend.

My first night working involved serving people food at a Lithuanian wedding. If you had to ask me what a Lithuanian wedding was I would have to say it is a lot like a drunken party in a 1980s food court. There was a ton of neon lighting in pink and blue along with people who were practically sweating alcohol. The most interesting part of the night wasn't the wedding, but the guy who was training me. I still am not full sure I understand him. He kept telling me to do specific things and then abruptly clarify that he wasn't my boss so I didn't necessarily have to do the very things he told me to do all while muttering it. Kid you not, he would say, "Ok, well, uh, you should serve them from the right and remove the plate from the left. That's just something I do, I mean, you don't have to do it. Also, lets try to serve the women first, but we don't have to, I mean, I'm not your boss or anything."

Status Effect - [Confused]

I can't tell if he was being extremely nice or extremely passive aggressive. I still haven't figured out how to cheer up Paul at all, but something should come up sooner or later.

This Week's Quests: 

• Devise ways to cheer up Paul
• Devise ways to infuriate new boss
• Get used to the new job
• Write for fun

To Be Continued...
Dave

Level 6 - Echo Screen Romance

Last Week's Quests - Completed!

It has been a few days and I still haven't heard anything from the Ad company, but who knows, things might go my way still. There hasn't been much to do besides keep myself occupied with looking for work, writing, reading. I finished Lamb by Christopher Moore and it is hysterical. It's about Jesus growing up with his goofball best friend. Returning it to the library was interesting because there is this girl that works there who I'm pretty sure I know from when I used to work on campus. Does anyone happen to know hot to hit on a librarian?

Used Item - Book Lamb

Status Effect - [Echo Screen]

Sure, a nurse is simple to hit on, you get sick and talk to her whenever she comes in. Does that work with librarians or do they shush you for talking in a library? Even still, what is there to talk about besides books and the Dewey decimal system? Do I ask her if you can make a late night deposit in her book slot? I don't know!

This week I decided to meet up with an old friend that I haven't seen in roughly a year.As it turns out my friend, Paul, had recently been left by his fiancee. I had never seen someone so down, I didn't know what to do. We ended up playing video games and watching TV.

Aside from that, my buddy Stan said he could help me get a job. We will see what happens with that. It appears I have my work cut out for me this week.

This Week's Quests: 

• Devise ways to cheer up Paul
• Visit Stan's work
• Write for fun 

To Be Continued...
Dave

Level 5 - Super Dave Cart

Last Week's Quests - Completed!

I think I can finally understand why people say job interviews are stressful. The entire week was spent writing copy and attempting to perfect it. It got to the point that I was thinking up copy about the soap in the shower.

Status Effect - [Stressed]

Everything had been all set up for the day of the interview. I had my portfolio on the table, clothes set out, and I was somewhat well rested. The problem came when I got dressed only to find out that my either my suit had shrunk or I grew. This lead to frantic racing to the store to find a cheap suit followed by racing back home to retrieve the portfolio I left behind. Sometimes I wish had a turtle shell to throw at the stop lights that take too damn long.

 Item Acquired - New Suit 

New Suit - Equipped


Anyway, the interview went well. I gave it my all, but I was asked a series of stupid questions. Aren't interviewers supposed to ask stuff like what is your greatest strength/weakness? I got questions like, "Can you tell me a time where you didn't want to work and a team and how you dealt with it?" What the hell kind of question is that?! The rest of the questions were simple by comparison. Now I get to play the waiting game to see if they call.

In an effort to be a little more sociable I joined a friend for the Chicago Wizard-Con. It was amazing. I met Lou Ferrigno, Colin Ferguson, Dean Stockwell (personal hero), James Hong, and two Suicide Girls (whatever those are). I talked to Dean about how my dad and I used to watch Quantum Leap together and how much his work influenced me as a kid, he is just as cool as he was on that show. Lou was actually a very positive figure as well telling me to Keep it up. Colin is just as positive as he is on Eureka and I talked to him about his role in The Stupidest Angel, which he told me a secret about that I'm not supposed to share. James, by far, was the most hilarious. We talked about his movies, his fans, and Brett Favre. He is probably the coolest 80-year-old I've ever met.

Status Effect - [Glowing Awesomeness]



This Week's Quests: 

• Wait for phone call from potential employer
•  Write for fun
• Finish & Return Lamb

To Be Continued...
Dave

Level 4 - Luck Plus

Last Week's Quests - Completed!

I received a phone call from one of the ad agencies I applied to. They asked me about my portfolio and I told them about a few of my creative & persuasive pieces. It's funny how many people piss and moan about getting job interviews. It can't be that hard if I got a call on one of my first tries.

 
Status Effect - [Lucky +]

All I know is that I have to beef up my portfolio a bit for this interview. I have a few pieces written in the format they would like, but it wouldn't hurt to have a few more. With any luck my portfolio should look fantastic. Wish me luck!



This Week's Quests: 

• Level Up my Portfolio
• Ace the Interview
• Read Lamb

To Be Continued...
Dave

Level 3 - Ghost Town, Ahoy

Last Week's Quest - Incomplete!


Don't get me wrong, two of the three quests were simple, but one needed a specific type of person. I sent out my credentials to several companies, which I have yet to hear back from, and I went to the bar on Thursday with a friend. Normally the bars are packed and cars line Main Street on a Thursday, but not this week. Everyone that went seemed content to walk and very few were out. Even the hookers and hobos seemed to find somewhere else to go. The only people to find at the bars were townies. Then I realized that most of my peers are probably working and are free on the weekend.

I went back Friday night, but it yielded the same results and, because of it, I spent part of Saturday reading a book from a library....

Item Acquired - Book Lamb


Except for when I went to go hang out with my artist friend Erik. He was doing sketches of superheroes for a showing of the new The Dark Knight Rises in a theater a few towns over. I even got to help and learned how to ink sketches.

Skill Acquired - Inking Lv 1

I had a lot of fun and the theater owner let us  see the new Batman movie for free. It was fantastic! I think it was a decent wrap up to the trilogy.

Status Effect - [Jubilation]

This Week's Quests: 

• Attempt Writing
• Read Lamb

To Be Continued...
Dave

Level 2 - Irony Mine

Last Week's Quest - Completed!

Achievement Unlocked! - Bachelorhood (5 GP)


Bachelorhood is what happens when you forget to check your personal email for several consecutive months. It comes after an email in which your girlfriend declares she is leaving for someone else because you are too distant.

You Obtained - Irony

This is ok. The addition of this nuance makes this adventure even grander. Most RPGs start off with a party where as I am starting off like Link, alone and with a wooden sword (that I fashioned out of some twigs earlier today in the park). Finding someone new to date is a new side quest on the road to adulthood.


In a different facet of my life, I've been beefing up my resume to send out to a few companies. I've researched a few companies and plan on sending out my credentials after I post this entry. Two of the companies are newspapers where a few others focus on me writing ad campaigns.

I realize I don't have much in the way of personal success right now, but I feel as though the world is my oyster. Things can go anyway I like provided I put the time in.

This Week's Quests:

• Send out credentials to potential jobs
• Go to bar
• Obtain a girl's phone number.

To Be Continued...
Dave

Level 1 - The New World

Graduate from College - Quest Completed!


That is correct, I finally graduated from college this past May. I took a little time to myself and had some fun familiarizing myself with this thing I haven't been acquaintances with in some time: FUN. I popped in a few old video games and remembered what it was like to relax. After that,  I started to go outside a bit more. Then it arrived in my post box today.

Item Obtained - College Degree

It is said that this flimsy piece of paper in an ornate folder has the ability to grant me servitude to anyone that needs someone with my skill set.


 All I can say to that is, "Suck it everyone that isn't me!" It occurs to me that, in retrospect, middle school sucked compared to high school and college made high school look like a shitty teen drama. If math has failed me, and my teacher for it did once in high school, then by transitive property whatever this section of life is called is bound to be even better than college.  

How could I not want to chronicle these times?

These are the times where I job hunt, start an exciting new career, party with peers, take my girlfriend out to-- Crap! I just realized that I forgot to send an email back to my girlfriend...about seven months ago.

Quests of the Week:

• Checking/Answering emails
• Job Hunt

To Be Continued....
Dave